A Letter To My Younger Self

I follow TEDTalks on Twitter and Facebook.  Recently there was a post about writing a letter to a younger you.  What advice would you give?  What tid bits would you give to your younger self?  Dance Spirit magazine also does a feature every month where they choose a dancer to write their former self. In light of both of these, I decided that maybe it was about time to write a letter to a young BalletJ. 

(A young BalletJ, circa 1998, hip hop costume!)

A Letter To My Younger Self

Dear Young BalletJ,

You are a free spirit.  You thrive on creativity and don’t often follow the beaten path.  At times, it’s hard, particularly since you always want to be so accepted by your peers.  However, this difficulty is what makes you realize that it’s not worth it later on in life.  The things that you have done in your childhood, teen years, and young adult life- the hours of dancing, the creative stories you’ve written, the effort you’ve made to make music a part of your life (even if you did despise those private flute lessons for a long time),  your decision to stay straight edge- they have all made you a better person today.

Don’t take things too seriously.   Laugh every so often at yourself. Your teachers are going to get mad at you (come on, you know you’re stubborn!).   You may be threatened to get kicked out of class once or twice for having hair fall in your face.  Your teachers may push your buttons to the point where you want to walk out of class, but stick to the dancing.  Remember that your emotions may run high, but acting as a professional will get your farther along in your career as both dancer and teacher if you remain calm.  You are only treated this way by these people because believe that you can handle it.  They wouldn’t push you if they didn’t think it was worth it.

There’s the thing- you ARE worth it!  Believe in yourself!  You are often so doubtful in your capabilities as a dancer that you don’t just GO for it!  Push yourself to your limits.  Reach a little farther, tilt a little more on your leg, push that straddle down a little more- it will all pay off.   Your teachers clearly trust in your capabilities, so you should, too! 

Do what makes you happy.  If going into dance is making you miserable, then don’t go to class.  I can guarantee you that you will only go through one period in your life where you won’t want to dance.  Remember that dance is your passion, and that you love it.  Dance has always been what makes you happy, even through the injuries, the broken hearts, the criticisms, and the disasters.  It’s been your only constant in life, and it will continue to be your constant.  No matter what anyone tells you- “it doesn’t pay enough” “you’ll never make a living off of it” “it’s not a real job” “what are you going to do when you want to retire?” “you’re not good enough to make it anywhere” etc- you will always have it.  That drive to prove everyone wrong will help, but it’s your tenacity to follow your dreams that will keep you hungry for dance.

You are unique.  You are a good person.  You LOVE dance.  Don’t lose that.  These qualities better your chances for being where you want to be.  Always continue to grow and learn, and never ever lose your hunger for more. 

Keep those feet pointed!
An Older Wiser BalletJ

Self-Discipline in the Dancer's World

Several months ago, I thought my life was going to hit a dark place.  I was fortunate enough to realize that it wasn’t a time to go to a dark place, but rather a place of light and happiness.  However, I sought friendship from people that I hadn’t talked to in a long time, and surrounded myself in a group of people that I knew would help in that journey.  In this time, I conversed with a friend that I hadn’t had a significant chat with in ages.  In the process of catching up, he suggested to me that I read a book to help me with my dancing and teaching.  It was only recently that attained this book and started reading. 

I’m only halfway through and it has changed my perspective on everything as a teacher.

I don’t know about any other teacher out there, but I know that there are days when using the week be fore’s lesson plan is easier than making up a new one.  Whether it’s the fact that you’re tired from that second or third job, or you had an opportunity to have lunch with a friend instead of create the lesson plan that you’ve put off doing all week, or your creativity for the week has seemed to run dry, there are situations that prevent us all from getting done what needs to be done.  These “situations”, however, are just excuses. 

The book that I am reading talks about personal resistance.   It’s not being able to get over that hump.  It’s about saying “I can totally do this later” or “I can definitely use last week’s lesson plan instead of creating one that will further enrich my students.”  These are situations that we create within ourselves.  These are situations that are easily moved past.  These are situations that require a self-discipline.

One thing that I have always loved about dance is that it is a necessity to acquire self-discipline.  You can’t be a student and expect to grow and develop without taking the initiative, and feeling the drive and motivation to better  yourself.  As a dancer, you need to stretch before you come into class.  You need to know that if your ankle is feeling tight you need to go home and rest it instead of going out with your friends.  If you’re a competitive dancer, you sacrifice a lot of your social life to be able to go to classes and competitions on the weekends.  If you’re a ballerina in a performing arts school, or a ballet school, you sacrifice having any sort of life outside of ballet.  Many dancers learn at a young age that they have to become independent and self-driven to achieve their dreams of becoming something great.

From a teaching perspective, there is a required amount of discipline as well.  Not only are you in charge of a group of children, but you are in charge of their development.  That is a heavy weight to carry.  On top of students’ development, a teacher is in charge of their own development as well.  Whether it’s taking the time to go take a class, or reading up on choreographers, or taking more courses in school that help you better understand a dance class, it’s about broadening your own horizons so you can pass the knowledge on to your own students.

Being a dancer and being a dance teacher is a wonderful journey.  You are constantly learning- there is no point where you will know it all.  The industry itself is in constant state of evolution.  Legs are kicking higher, revolutions in turns are becoming more, the dances are becoming faster, and there is an overall desire to create stronger and more flexible dancers.  As the industry demands more, we as teachers must demand more.  That includes not only from our students, but from ourselves.  This is our self-discipline. 

Take the time each day to enrich your dance life.  Take the time to finish that biography on Twyla Tharp.  Got no one to go with to see that ballet you were interested in?  Go by yourself!  Take that class from that teacher that you’re terrified of being judged by.  Overcome that demon inside that is telling you to slack, or the one that is telling you that you can’t do as much as you’d want to.  Not only will it better you and your students, but the sense of accomplishment you will feel afterwards will be worth it all.

I’ve overcome my first personal resistance of the day now.  How about you?